By Nicholas Mills
Let me start by saying that I love my mom dearly. She's a great lady, and an even better mother. She thinks about her kids before she thinks of herself...unless it is Christmas morning. When Christmas morning rolls around, she makes everyone in the whole family put on these incredibly lame Christmas tee shirts that started losing their charm somewhere around 5th grade. It's not just the immediate family, either. This is a massive family portrait with cousins, uncles, aunts, and whoever is within thirty feet of the front door who can fit into one of these shirts. My sister and I hate it.
I'm 19 years old now, and my sister is 17. We're both in college and out of the house, so we had to travel all the way across the state in order to attend Christmas at my parents house. We both attend the same college, so I drove the both of us there. On the way, my sister just looks at me and says, "I'm not doing the Christmas picture thing again this year. Mom said she's putting them on Facebook. I'll die."
I'm 19 years old now, and my sister is 17. We're both in college and out of the house, so we had to travel all the way across the state in order to attend Christmas at my parents house. We both attend the same college, so I drove the both of us there. On the way, my sister just looks at me and says, "I'm not doing the Christmas picture thing again this year. Mom said she's putting them on Facebook. I'll die."
What? Mom knows how to use Facebook now? I vaguely remember a late night when I accepted a friend request from her, laughing at how silly the thought of her on Facebook was. The whole thing seemed much less funny now. We rode along in silence for a long while before I looked at her and replied, "Yeah. That is absurd. There is no way I'm going to let her ruin my life with those photos of hers. This is the year we make a stand." We both steeled our nerves and considered the implications of our decision.
The whole clan was already there to greet us when we showed up, and we got handed around for hugs and handshakes. I had a great time visiting with everyone and catching up on everyone's lives during dinner. I knew that mom wouldn't bring up the Christmas t-shirts issue until later, or even the next morning. I let my guard down and I spent some good quality time with the people who love me most. It was really nice and I admit that I got caught up in the Christmas spirit.
I had just managed to forget about the axe falling when mom came up to me with that glitter in her eye, holding my shirt out to me. She was like some surprise predator in the jungle, springing out from cover to claw my psyche apart with lame Christmas shirts instead of claws. I unfolded the shirt and looked at a huge family of snowmen all standing in a pose with arms around each other. I knew instantly that we were all going to have to pose in the same formation as this snowman family on the shirt.
I went upstairs to find my sister sitting on the edge of the bed with her shirt in her lap, looking miserable. "You know how sad it'll make her if we do
The whole clan was already there to greet us when we showed up, and we got handed around for hugs and handshakes. I had a great time visiting with everyone and catching up on everyone's lives during dinner. I knew that mom wouldn't bring up the Christmas t-shirts issue until later, or even the next morning. I let my guard down and I spent some good quality time with the people who love me most. It was really nice and I admit that I got caught up in the Christmas spirit.
I had just managed to forget about the axe falling when mom came up to me with that glitter in her eye, holding my shirt out to me. She was like some surprise predator in the jungle, springing out from cover to claw my psyche apart with lame Christmas shirts instead of claws. I unfolded the shirt and looked at a huge family of snowmen all standing in a pose with arms around each other. I knew instantly that we were all going to have to pose in the same formation as this snowman family on the shirt.
I went upstairs to find my sister sitting on the edge of the bed with her shirt in her lap, looking miserable. "You know how sad it'll make her if we do
The whole clan was already there to greet us when we showed up, and we got handed around for hugs and handshakes. I had a great time visiting with everyone and catching up on everyone's lives during dinner. I knew that mom wouldn't bring up the Christmas t-shirts issue until later, or even the next morning. I let my guard down and I spent some good quality time with the people who love me most. It was really nice and I admit that I got caught up in the Christmas spirit.
I had just managed to forget about the axe falling when mom came up to me with that glitter in her eye, holding my shirt out to me. She was like some surprise predator in the jungle, springing out from cover to claw my psyche apart with lame Christmas shirts instead of claws. I unfolded the shirt and looked at a huge family of snowmen all standing in a pose with arms around each other. I knew instantly that we were all going to have to pose in the same formation as this snowman family on the shirt.
I went upstairs to find my sister sitting on the edge of the bed with her shirt in her lap, looking miserable. "You know how sad it'll make her if we don't do it, don't you?" I said, and she just nodded. "You know we have to wear these or it's going to ruin her day, right?" She just nodded again and sighed heavily. I tried to be helpful by saying, "Maybe she won't put them on Facebook if we ask her?" The look I got was shooting daggers at me and I knew how silly I was to think that. Mom wins again.
About the Author:
I had just managed to forget about the axe falling when mom came up to me with that glitter in her eye, holding my shirt out to me. She was like some surprise predator in the jungle, springing out from cover to claw my psyche apart with lame Christmas shirts instead of claws. I unfolded the shirt and looked at a huge family of snowmen all standing in a pose with arms around each other. I knew instantly that we were all going to have to pose in the same formation as this snowman family on the shirt.
I went upstairs to find my sister sitting on the edge of the bed with her shirt in her lap, looking miserable. "You know how sad it'll make her if we don't do it, don't you?" I said, and she just nodded. "You know we have to wear these or it's going to ruin her day, right?" She just nodded again and sighed heavily. I tried to be helpful by saying, "Maybe she won't put them on Facebook if we ask her?" The look I got was shooting daggers at me and I knew how silly I was to think that. Mom wins again.
About the Author:
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